Celebrate July 4th with the Red, White, and Blue (and cake)

Independence Day of the United States, also referred to as the Fourth of July or July Fourth in the U.S., is a federal holiday...

Make Food Great Again With A HUGE Cheat Meal

Build a wall around your refrigerator. Keep out all dieters. One cheat night a week is BS. Shoot for 4-6 cheat nights. You can diet when...

Which will kill you faster?

Women. Definetly women...

Close Your Damn Mouth

You will get a fork in the forehead if you don't CLOSE your mouth while chewing. 

Why drink it at all?

Why tease yourself? Why limit yourself?

Stretch your weekend with beer!

Why can't it be the weekend all week and the week only 2 days a week? See what we did there....

Get the poison out. 

Hit it hard or don't complain about your grossly extended saddlebags that flap around your disgustingly large multiple dimpled cup cake exploding ass... Make it...

Forget Romance. Give Me Food

People should just be honest. I LOVE FOOD. I LOVE EATING. Online profile complete and accurate. Honesty is the ONLY way to go.

The best salad ever 

I KNEW IT! Drinking lots and lots of beer will help me looooooooose weight. 

Because “F-ing starving” was already being used. 

I'm always either starving or disgustingly full. Each leads directly to the other and both make me absolutely miserable.  Completely miserable. 


Your Move Jesus. Your Move.

Let's see if you can top that Mr. Son Of God. 1 point for us. 0 points for Jesus.

Poetry Slam Ilike2complain Style!

We know we got the skills to pay the bills. 

Honest Happy Mother’s Day #2 – stretched vagina!

Honest Mother's Day message #2 from - Happy Mother's Day moms! Don't drink when pregnant. Don't drink wine when pregnant. Don't drink gin when...